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Sobbing 3-Year-Old Really Wants to Be Governor of New Jersey

Poor three-year-old Jesse here can’t stop sobbing in the car ride home, because people keep telling him that he’s too small to be governor of New Jersey. By current New Jersey gubernatorial size standards, he is absolutely too small. But can’t somebody make an exception? This passionate kid is volunteering to be governor of New Jersey, one of the worst jobs in America.

When I was three I wanted to be a squirrel…